Mary: I’m a little Yorkshire lass
Up in town at present,
And I fancy in my glass
I look not unpleasant.
But it bothers me to see
Silly people waiting,
Saying they’re in love with me,
I’m so fascinating,
When I’m nothing of the sort.
Chorus of Dudes: But you are!
Mary: No, I’m nothing of the sort.
Chorus of Dudes: Yes you are!
Mary: Mary, people call me pretty Mary,
I don’t believe them, for they often tell me fibs!
Chorus of Dudes: Oh, believe us, do!
Mary: Mary is a girl, and not a fairy,
I wish they wouldn’t call me Mary
When my name’s Miss Gibbs.
Chorus of Dudes: Mary, we adore you, pretty Mary,
So do believe us, for we never tell you fibs!
Mary: Yes, you tell me fibs!
Chorus of Dudes: Mary, you’re a perfect little fairy,
We wish you’d let us call you Mary
Though your name’s Miss Gibbs.
Mary: I am not a little fool,
Not what I should call so,
I have learnt some things at school
Something after, also!
But I really cannot see
Any cause whatever,
For you’re always calling me
Wonderfully clever!
When I’m nothing of the sort.
Chorus of Dudes: But you are!
Mary: No, I’m nothing of the sort.
Chorus of Dudes: Yes you are!
Mary: Mary, people call me clever Mary,
I don’t believe them, for they often tell me fibs!
Chorus of Dudes: Oh, believe us, do!
Mary: Mary isn’t wise but she is wary,
I’m just a canny girl from Yorkshire,
And my name’s Miss Gibbs.
Chorus of Dudes: Mary, we admire you, clever Mary,
So do believe us, for we never tell you fibs!
Mary: Yes, you tell me fibs!
Chorus of Dudes: Mary, you are wise as you are wary,
You are the smartest girl in London,
Though your name’s Miss Gibbs.
Mary: Miss Gibbs, if you please!
Chorus of Dudes: Let us call you Mary, dear!
Mary: Miss Gibbs, if you please!
All: Miss Gibbs!
Adrian Ross (1859-1933)